+106 The Best of MFW SS23
Bottega Veneta Look 1
I learnt when I was only a little babe that two times a year, the leading designers of the world meet up and decide what the trends are going to be for the following season. However they decide to interpret those is up to them. I’ve always wondered what it would be like to be a fly on the wall during these meetings, and every season I try to guess what trends they decided on. They’ll never tell us, of course, but as the fashion weeks drag on, like a jigsaw puzzle, it all becomes clear. One question the Italians seem to be asking themselves this season is, “Puoi vedere i miei capezzoli attraverso?” which for all you non-Italians out there means, “Can you see my nips through this shirt?” Clearly, the answer is yes, as sheer seems to be going from strength to strength.
Fendi this season was not particularly exciting, and I think it was due to Kim Jones being overworked. The creative director of both Dior Men’s and Fendi, Kim put on two shows for Fendi just this season, with the 25 Year Anniversary of the Fendi Baguette being shown in NYC earlier this month. I’m not quite sure why it had to be a separate show, and why they simply couldn’t merge the two, because what we’ve got is mediocre at best (although I’m not going the lie, the whole collection was in my favourite colour scheme – bronze and sage green, where you at?). It was giving Dior SS22, which worries me as Maria Grazia Chiuri is not what she once was, and I fear her current clump is rubbing off on Kim on his Dior days of the week. Don’t you know the rules, Kim? Don’t bring work home – keep it at the office.
Ballet slippers seem to be going from strength to strength, so dig out those old Repetto’s and start investing in Chanel flats, because they’re coming back. After Miu Miu showcased them in its A/W22 show (I’ve been meaning to buy some, but I just can’t stomach spending £600 on white satin ballet flats in London, which I know will turn a soggy brown about 20 metres outside the shop), Tod’s have done their own version too, while MM6 Maison Margiela presented some genuine pointe slippers, which for you normies means ballet slippers with a big, blocky, heavy square toe. I am very tempted to buy a pair of those, as I still feel bitter about never graduating to pointe in my ballet days. Who says fashion isn’t about reliving the glory days?
The glorious thing about Prada, is that Miuccia’s design is so distinctive, that often I find her only reference is herself. This SS23, Prada’s collection was reminiscent of her work back in Spring 2009, with collars and button-downs galore, along with crinkled silk – great news for the lazy side in all of us, especially me who wears a lot of silk and cannot be bothered to stand around and iron. The crinkly days are back, baby! Have you bought something online, unfolded it from its packet and put it straight on? No worries! Those tell-tale wrinkles are in fashion now, and if anyone makes fun of you for your lack of laundry etiquette, just tell them it’s on purpose, and shove Vogue Runway’s review under their snooty little noses. Otherwise, the rest of the collection was giving creepy-woman-who-lives-in-a-haunted-house-and-has-been-crying-while-wearing-mascara, but I’ll give her a pass. Why not? She’s Miuccia! She’s kooky.
Meanwhile, Moschino was typically fugly, with inflatable hearts adorning dresses and blow-up handbags galore. A commentary on the recent financial inflation? A bit on the nose, I’d say – and also think that Jeremy Scott is always out to create something “creative” or “out-of-the-box” (we call that “unique” and “character-filled” in the copy world) i.e. disgustingly novelty, and probably had a conversation with one of his friends who had just had an enormous boob job and decided inflatables was the way to go. Is Scott on a sinking ship? Someone blow up this man a life raft.
Blumarine decided to move on from its ‘90s Mariah Carey butterfly phase and into ‘90s Xtina era, with gothic crucifixes replacing the fluttery motif. This lots of denim: low-rise flared jeans that peplum out from the knee, bustier midi dresses and ruffled miniskirts. Think after Britney Spears but before Paris Hilton’s Ed Hardy phase. Ah, yes. The sweet spot.
I’m pretty sure GCDS’ SS23 collection was inspired by Sexy Patrick. As in, Patrick Starr, from SpongeBob Squarepants. Pink net dresses with Patrick Starr (is it Star or Starr? I’m going to go with Starr as it sounds like more of a stripped name, which is also the vibe of Sexy Patrick) nipple covers, distressed yellow denim skirts that are so distressed, they’re basically just cotton strings, and my personal favourite, a sheer black mini dress with Sexy Patrick outlined in black sequins. Do you want me to say that one more time? Hey little mama let me whisper in your ear: Sexy Patrick…
Missoni was very disappointing for me. After Margarita’s exit, I was hoping the new designer, Filippo Grazioli, would infuse some life into the brand; they have all these amazing patterns and knit craftsmanship, and somehow he couldn’t come up with anything exciting for SS23…. Summer! The season when Missoni should shine! And I couldn’t find one look I would go out and spend money on. I was so impressed by the last Spring/Summer collection Margarita did; I hope this presentation was Filippo finding his footing, and creating a springboard for which to launch the brand into its true potential.
Gucci’s collection seems to have been inspired by twins and Furbies. I would like to refrain from commenting at this time.
Bottega Veneta took a leaf out of Hedi Slimane’s book over at Celine and went for understated cool, which if you’ve been listening to me at all, is the way the fashion world is heading (because – say it with me – the… fashion… world… reflects… the… economy! Yes, well done). Plaid overshirts, cool denim, block natural colours, and simple silhouettes ruled the beginning of Mattieu Blazy’s collection, which as it wore on, became more and more intricate, mixing that high and low fashion that has become the modern world’s M.O. Leather played a huge role with not only the Intrecciato weave, but through leather trousers and dresses, showcasing the brand’s humble roots and all it’s learned in the process. I haven’t tried the clothing yet, but I hope Blazy’s pattern cutting is better than Daniel Lee’s – who has, by the way, been named as Burberry’s new designer. I can’t say I’m upset; Tisci is not my fave and it will be interesting to see if Burberry blossoms under wunderkind Lee’s direction.
Dolce & Gabbana commissioned Kim Kardashian to pick out her favourite looks from 1987 and 2007, which the pair would then rework to showcase today. Yes, of course, those looks are fabulous, but it’s hard to look past the blatant hiring of Kardashian to cover up the controversies that plague the brand and distract the fashion crowd (which, let’s be honest, is quite easy to do). Take their designs with a pinch of salt, and know that when you ooh and ahh over the Italian brand, you’re being manipulated for profit’s sake. We all know Kim K can be bought, but it’s a shame such a high-profile celebrity (and a woman of colour? I’m still not sure) would choose to work with such inflammatory and racist figures. Saying that, I’ll leave you with this quote from Kartrashian herself: “Yes, I have this futuristic alien Barbie personality, which I like. But in my soul I feel very sensual Italian mob wife at the same time. I don’t know if that’s appropriate to say.”
Versace went full goth this SS23, and I’m happy to report, much to my 5’3” glee, that platform heels are still on prime display, with a wicked pointy toe and a bewitching sculptural heel. Now, when the colour made its appearance, imagine Hot Topic in its heyday, just more feminine. Speaking of hot: to close the runway, Paris Hilton strutted her stuff in a glittering pink mini dress. Now, that’s hot.
See you next week!